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i asked to be removed.

it's not like i need this.

but nooo.

apparently i'm the popular choice.

this sucks.

it's disgustingly hard to keep smiling everyday.

and try to meet everyone's requests.

and keep the stupid cliques together.

and yet not too far apart.

and make sure everyone's in their happy little cliques.

and still make sure that no feuding parties get stuck together.

and it's not like anyone's grateful or anything.

ranon's driving me up the wall.

this sucks.

i've been in a horrible bad mood ever since i got this.

no thanks that the people who i have to take control of are the ones that i want to strangle and hug at the same time.

and i can't even bitch properly when the whole world reads this.

too lazy to blog so just let me copy this from mel.

so anyways, anj WAITED for me for almost three whole hours so we could go get our eyebrows threaded at little india. her sister's coming back soon from london or someplace and she wants to pretty herself up, because in her words, her sister always looks "perfect".

yup and after that we went to komala's again! hahah and I ordered the same thing and we sat in the same place and oh my but aren't I a creature of habit.

I think school just spoils everything. it puts you in a bad mood all the time and just switches off the desire for you to learn anything. unless you're in arts. because I personally find the subjects more interesting. but I'd probably only be able to take it at an interest level. plus, I still don't understand why we have to know that oxygen is the last electron acceptor in oxidative phosphorylation. being in school just ruins the whole day. there are too many people. I was not meant to be around people. I swear I'm schizo.

but anj rocks hahah she actually told zheng to be nice to me. so sweet right?

and we were swapping stories about stupid guys who are sweet sometimes and how it's really suprising because they're usually not. and how most guys usually pull your pigtails to tell you you're their friend. stupid karl.

and while we were walking back to the little india mrt station, they were playing the ANJALI SONG! REALLY LOUDLY hahahah it's a sign! omg it was damn funny apparently nik's mom burst out into that song when she told her that she was out with anjali. hahah these poor people with song names. like mandy and candy and melody and grace and laura hahahah.

ooh and let me tell you a story! --


(anj is leaning on abbie's not very high shoulder. abbie's alot shorter than anj.)

anj: you know, if you grew a few more inches you'd make a pretty good boyfriend.

abbie: *with her mischievious smile*... I don't know if I should say this but

anj: what? say!

abbie: er.. a few inches where?

eeaagh! hahah and when anj was telling me that story she shouted at abbie: what were you thinking?
and I said: obviously not what you were thinking.
so abbie asked: are you thinking what I'm thinking B1? and I just had to replied: I think I am B2.

so anj made a passing remark (or so I thought): hey guess what? they're both bananas.

at first I thought she was just being silly, but then abbie went: eeagh! and then my mind when click and I went: eeaaagh!

EVIL!! they've contaminated me!!

anyway, i'm not as dirty minded as mel put it out to be.
oh.

and we were having this gp debate today. about the political system by mill and aristotle i think. about how much individual freedom the state should present.

and then the debate became really sidetracked about premaritial sex.

then like the gp woman polled the guys and asked how many of them are against it. an no one did anything. and then she asked how many girls were pro premaritial sex. and vid went "eeeyur.." in a typical if-you-own-up-all-the-20-girls-in-the-class-will-think-your're-cheap way. so no one said anything.

so it seemed like all the guys were pro, and the girls anti.

sad how quiet we are. if a guy owned up, he'd be considered prude.
if a girl owned up, she'd be called a slut.

at least some people are more open about it.

zach: premaritial sex is hardly reckless.. it gives the person more responsibility..
zheng: no what. if i have sex with a girl, and she doesn't get pregnant, then i have no more responsibility what...
*whole big uproar by the girls in the class*

how do you manage to keep yourself in these kind of things, zheng?

but actually, on the whole issue..
i don't know. maybe it's the whole desire to rebel, but what's so bad about premaritial sex..?

i don't exactly advocate it.. but i don't condone it either. i mean, people should just be left alone to do what they want to.

if someone i knew came up to me and told me that she was going to do it, i would just tell her to stay safe and have fun.

ok, that sounded cheap.

but the point i'm trying to make here is that there's no point in the state trying to control people and prevent them from having premaritial sex.

what are they going to do?

ask for your marriage certificate if you're going into hotel 81 with a guy for the night?

or only sell condoms if you show up with your wife to prevent infidelity?

the most they can do is make sure their citizens stay safe.

by advocating bith control and stuff.

the herd mentality of having 19 other girls in the class is that sometimes, we get too righteous with ourselves and insist that all 20 of us would end up virgins till our wedding day.

gime me a break.

*msn convo where zheng is pissed off that i'm never free to go eat dinner with him.*

desperate: everyone has a little dirty laundry. says:aiyah not my fault we're both busy right?
Seii says:no its your fault coz i am the free one u are the bz one
desperate: everyone has a little dirty laundry. says:eh karl owes me food
desperate: everyone has a little dirty laundry. says:maybe if he comes he'll pay.
desperate: everyone has a little dirty laundry. says:or is this dinner like exclusively you and me?
Seii says:...exclusively.
desperate: everyone has a little dirty laundry. says:so will you pay for me?
desperate: everyone has a little dirty laundry. says:then karl can owe you dinner instead.
Seii says:...
Seii says:no
Seii says:haha
desperate: everyone has a little dirty laundry. says:aiyah
desperate: everyone has a little dirty laundry. says:same what.
Seii says:no lah its diff
desperate: everyone has a little dirty laundry. says: why don't you just go for dinner with karl? after your council meetings or something. then i can like not be your date for dinner.
Seii says:nono. cannot.
desperate: everyone has a little dirty laundry. says:why cannot?
Seii says: coz i don't want karl.
desperate: everyone has a little dirty laundry. says:then what do you want?
Seii says:u.
Seii says:i want u.
desperate: everyone has a little dirty laundry. says:... you're terribly troublesome. and fussy too.
Seii says:aiya i am booooooored
desperate: everyone has a little dirty laundry. says:
whatever.
desperate: everyone has a little dirty laundry. says:i'm blogging.
desperate: everyone has a little dirty laundry. says:abuot you and your premaritial sex.
Seii says:hahaha
Seii says:can lemme read?
desperate: everyone has a little dirty laundry. says:hmm
desperate: everyone has a little dirty laundry. says:let me finish and i'll see.
Seii says:walaaaau i wanna read, haha sounds intersting
desperate: everyone has a little dirty laundry. says:aiyah read mel's
desperate: everyone has a little dirty laundry. says:she updates more pften
Seii says:yuck
desperate: everyone has a little dirty laundry. says:..i told you to be nice to her la.
Seii says:haha i havent spoke to her since aftwer PW
Seii says:haha
desperate: everyone has a little dirty laundry. says:why can't you just be nice?
desperate: everyone has a little dirty laundry. says:you be nice to her..
desperate: everyone has a little dirty laundry. says:or i shall never go otu with you again.
desperate: everyone has a little dirty laundry. says:and you will be left alone pining without me, my infectious charm that you can't resist and my expertise knowledge in italian food.
desperate: everyone has a little dirty laundry. says:and you'll be kept up every night unable to fall asleep with a neverending scream at the back of your head going, "where's my pizza?!"
desperate: everyone has a little dirty laundry. says:and you'd kick yourself for being a jerk and refusing to be nice and civil towards my friends and losing me in the process.
desperate: everyone has a little dirty laundry. says:haha. i sound drunk.
Seii says:hahaa
Seii says:yes u do
Seii says:why are u so malist
Seii says:nono feminisit
desperate: everyone has a little dirty laundry. says:how is that feminist?
Seii says:haha coz u never side me
desperate: everyone has a little dirty laundry. says:that's just totally unrelated la.
desperate: everyone has a little dirty laundry. says:and besides, i never side you cause your side is always wrong.

valentine's.. and no one.

and it doesn't really help that i'm the only person in the whole universe who hasn't gone on a proper date.

well there's zheng who keeps disturbing me to go out.. but we both know that he only wants me to go to the restaurant and pick out the nice food for him cause he can't differentiate focaccia and copietta.

bleah. i've realized that only really free people get depressed.

like today. after not having to do anymore after mel cancelled. just went back home.
and stoned around. and stoned somemore. and ate. and watched malcolm in the middle. and walked around my room. and tried to clear it up.

then like you sit around and look at the millions of photos. and wonder how you can still be so unphotogenic when you've already deleted all the unphotogenic ones.

and you look at the pictures and wonder whether your friends are your friends.. or just other people.

and how one can actually become resistant to atkins.

which is what's wrecking havoc on me.

but installed speakers to the com.
feel nice and tech savvy.

only that they actually sound the same with or without them since the lcd has inbuilt speakers.

and the speakers have no place to be put.. cause when the curtains are drawn one of them keeps falling over.

oh well.

nik and i saw pug jelly at the dhoby gaut mrt station.

well 2/3 of pug jelly. the angmoh brothers and their friend.

today was useless. the boys bully me.

me: eh karl.. there's no chair here.
karl: oh . then look around.
me: .. you're sitting on two chairs karl..
karl: too bad..
me: ehh.. give me one..
karl: go find another one.
me: it's the same whether you sit on one or two.. kaaarl... it's my chair.
karl: no this is ranon's chair..
me: just give it to me!
karl: no.
me: pravin.. karl won't give me a chair.
pravin: .. then take mine. *carries his chair over*
me: *momentarily wondering if ot was possible for pravin to actually do something nice for me*
pravin: *whines* zaaach.. anjali took my chair..
zach: fine. then take mine. *passes pravin his chair*.. *whines* glendaaa.. pravin took my chair.
glenda: *ignores*
zach: *takes his chair back from pravin*
pravin: *takes his chair back from me*
karl: *still continues sitting on my chair stacked on his*

so after a long while and lots of pen marks later, i end up sitting on the floor sulking to myself. until the boys seem to think that trapping me under tables is a fun idea.

cause karla and zach started surrounding me in tables.
and i screamed at pravin to come and save me.
and he came.

and smiled.

and pushed the tables *over* me.

some big brother.

so i was just left there, hidden from everyone's sight. and ranon had to come save me after he got sick of me screaming.

boys.

went shopping with nik and found this thing which erally reminded me of karl.
so i bought it.

how useless. he bullies me to no end. and i go buy him a present.

hmph. the things i do.

an old friend called me up today to watch desperate housewives.

and we were talking during the show.

then the stepford wife woman came out..

"eh.. that's so you! the psycho.."

hmph.

but things have seriosuly changed.

i mean, i was never a stepford wife..
i am far from perfect, trust me.

and my hair *never* stays in one place.

and i'm much less control freakish now.
way way less.

to the total opposite end of the spectrum.

eating tuna straight out of the tin is not that bad.

neither is tuna with dark chocolate.

hey, don't judge me until you've tried it.

planning to be weird and call hongyan and tell her that i'm eating her extremely dark, extremely expensive chocolates with ntuc fairprice tuna.

she'd probably kill me if she found out.

that's why i like her dark chocolate. because it's *so* dark.. and *so* bitter.. and *so* rich.. and *so* expensive..

and the great thing is that unlike the cheap fake chocolates, you have to stop after a while with godiva, cause it's so good, you're just not good enough to take another slice.

great way to curb overeating.

no wonder the french stay thin.

hari raya holidays are almost over. so sad.
slept once i got home from school on thursday.

ponned tamil.. to go home and sleep.

friday was spent at doro's house. she's horribly independent. quite good actually. i'll freak if my parents left me at home for the entire month. the house will end up like an extension of my room. which is bad. very bad.

she keeps cleaning up the place. it's so freakishly neat. and she shooed me away from her couch to vacuum it when i put my feet on the seat. and she banished me to the floor.
and then kept screaming as she vacuumed *around* me when she did the floor.

her: *screaming over the vacuum cleaner* oi. move.
me: *slides over like 5 inches* the floor is clean!
her: no! it's not!
me: it's damn clean la. your whole house is damn clean. can you please stop cleaning it?!
her: it's not! *points to microscopic spot* see?!
me: aiyah. it's so small.. what's the use..
her: *scrubs the floor violently using the vacuum cleaner handle*
me: ...
her: i'm a good wife.
me: if i were your husband, i'll just die.

haha. i'm such a slob.

her class came over for a party so i helped her cook.
ok, i helped her stir the pan. and ate the pineapple pieces when she wasn't looking.

besides, that's more help than i give my own mom.

so that was friday.

saturday was spent shopping with soh ee. clothes shopping on a saturday in orchard road is useless. then she dragged me to marina bay to meet her og cause pravin ditched her, and she didn't want to be the only j2 there..and as pravin's sister i was supposedly "required" to go take his place.

so after much grumbling ended up kite flying.. in a skirt mind you, with soh ee's og. they're quite nice kids. but a little scary when two of them knew more about me than soh ee.

and i had no idea who they were.

one of them was one of my rmun kids. who keeps calling me pravin. or krishni. which he thinks is a nice name for pravin's arranged marriage wife.
which is damn gross since i told him that there was no way i was going to marry my brother.
especially if he was already attached to one of my best friends.

and one of the girls asked if i was pravin's girlfriend.
gross.

and another one who read my blog. which was freaky since she was asking if i knew "this girl".. and i didn't know what to say.. then she said that she read my blog.

i guess it's cool to finally meet the person who's blog you've been reading..
but it's strange for me..

it was worse when this kid asked if i was narepuk from ricebowl journals and asked for an autograph when we were at mcs eating..

that was super freaky.

i guess i should be happy that i've reached c list celebrity status..

and it was probably someone who knew me and my blog and was just playing a prank on me or something..

we had steamboat for dinner.
soh ee's super nice. she keeps cooking the food for me and putting it on my plate, when she has none for herself.

which is probably because i was so useless.

her: your chicken's burning.
me: oh. ok. *puts it on plate* is it done? how do you tell?
her: look at it.
me: i'm looking at it.
her: *sighs and looks over* no it's not.. *puts it over the grill*
me: why not? it's burnt right. so isn't it well done already?
her: *stares* you just can't cook la.

when home after that with her and fell asleep again.

sunday was just spent stoning around and being arty.
went to popular and the it guys are actually nice.

maybe it was cause i was wearing my poser nike laptop bag.

call me suaku..or whatever.. but i think a computer geek in bermudas is cool.. sort of a laid back genius..

bleah. anyway, the it guy said that i have a nice laptop bag.
i said that it was nice cause it was nike.

and decided that it was best that i keep the fact that the laptop bag had no laptop inside to myself.

had to buy a mouse for my dad, cause something happened to his old one.
cause a pretty optical one that was more expensive.. but it was pretty..

and then walked around and got sticky tape and paint and photopaper to print pictures on my printer straight.

met shan to borrow her cds and burn them..

and painted my ikea box because i couldn't stand the disgusting red design.

and school starts in 8 hours. and i have done nothing.

marv.

have to finish my chem tutorial by tomorrow.

crap.

and the proposal by today.

bleah.

goodnight.

I am 44% evil.




I could go either way. I have sinned quite a bit but I still have a bit of room for error. My life is a tug of war between good and evil.


Are you evil? find out at Hilowitz.com

new layout yay.

and new post in eons too.

nothing much has changed.

cleaned up room a little. that's all.

i'm leaving a line after every sentence.

ok. shall stop doing that.

from now.

crap.

oh well.

went to doro's house today under the pretence of studying. ended up helping her cook lunch and stuff for her potluck party. and looking at her photos. i like looking at photos. everyone looks so happy and stuff.

supposed to hand in the proposal for the class learning journey today. too bad.

bio teacher's giving me a lot of special attention nowadays. guess it's for my own good.

like yesterday when her lesson ended and as the class was filing out..
she: anjali.. can you explain the cardiac cycle to me?
me: uhm.. ya?
she: *drags a chair next to me and sits down* ok then. explain it.
me: *stares blankly at my multicoloured notes and tries to make some sense out of it.

so we spent break re re going through the cardiac cycle.

bio is actually quite interesting.
if i could get it.

ugh.

if i could.

perfect.

go *one* day without anti frizz..

and the next morning, a sunday, nonetheless.. parents look at me and go.. "why is your hair so frizzy?!"

yes. i know gee's hair all slick and straight and rebonded.

but still..

the only solace i have is that my hair is *way* less frizzy than what hers used to be.

but this seriously shows how anti frizz serum is taking over my life.

and of course the parents tried to make it up for calling my natural hair ugly.

this is me.

hanging around "sars place".
ie my dad's place.

using his computer wasting time away.
usually go late for appointments.

this time i'm *real* early.

so i'm here slacking in his office.

the doctors are walking around centrifuging stuff. maybe i should go and disturb them until he comes back. the least they would do is pretend to be nice to their boss' daughter.

he's still at a meeting now.
he'll come in, see me in his office and go, "what are you doing here?" in a totally indifferent way.

oh well.

till 3pm.