somewhere between the procrastination and the homework..
and the incessant forwards and the friendships
and the calls to each other complaining about crushes and boyfriends..
and ex boyfriends.

somewhere between the phone calls to old friends
and the "I miss you's",
the "I love you's"
and the "What are we doing tonight's?"

and somewhere between all of the changing and growing...
somewhere between the classes and the skipping classes...

and the studying for tests
and the pretending to "study" for tests

and the downright not studying for tests...

i forgot what school was all about.

somewhere between all the appointments, starbucks coffee and mc donald's...
paying bills and then not paying bills...

making plans.

then breaking plans...

appearing...
disappearing...
then reappearing...

i forgot what it was like to cry.

i forgot that pretending to be happy doesn't make you happy.
and that pretending to be smart doesn't make you smart.

i forgot that you can't just forget the past in fear of the future.

i forgot that you can't control falling in love..
and that you can't make yourself fall in love.

i learned that i can love.
and i learned that it's okay to mess up.

it's okay to ask for help.

and it's okay to feel like crap.
i learned it's okay to complain and whine to all your friends for a whole day.

i learned that sometimes the things you want most of the things you just can't have.

and the things that you look for are right in front of you.

i learned that the greatest thing about school and college and even the working world
isn't about the parties or the drinking or the hookups.

it's the friendships which means taking chances.

i learned that sometimes the things we want to forget are the things which we most need to talk about.

i learned that time and love can heal all things

i learned that just when you think it can't get worse - it does.

but with the love and support of friends - you survive.

i've learned that when you start feeling bad about losing touch and about those that you've lost, they too are feeling the same way.

i learned that letters from friends are the most important things.

and that sending cards to your friends makes you feel better.

but basically, i learned that my friends, both old and new,
are the most important people to me in the world.
and without them, i wouldn't be who i am today.

So this is a THANK YOU to all of my friends.

for always being there.